Tring tring!! : Hello, HSBC, don’t you provide customer service anymore??

It was an accidental day of 5th December that I lost my credit card, as so anyone would have done called HSBC to block the card and register a request to issue a new one. The card was immediately blocked and I was told that the new one would reach the destination within 4 working days. That was once upon a time…….

It’s been more than 2 months and I am still waiting. May be, the worlds local bank went abroad. In this time span of about 2 months and 18 days I’ve made numerous calls trying to find out one valid reason for the delay but to my surprise they have got a big list of excuses established company wide. The first call of inquiry which got connected after repeated attempts ended up with an answer “sir, I don’t see any request for re-issue of the card”. So, I put a new request and got a promise of a new card within 4 working days. But I was waiting …………

The second call was even better. By the way do not forget every time you call you have to go through a long route of check points. Anyways, the second answer was “Sir, no request for re-issue has been made as per our records”. I was so stunned by the reply that instead of shouting, I found the situation funny and Kapil’s voice started to ring in my ears “Pamolive ka jawab nahi”. Without say a word I made another request. The same promise was made; I guess they forgot to make a complementary list of promises along with the excuse list. But how can the result be any different.

It was start of January and they had made a serious progress by the New Year. My request of reissue had been recorded by the time I made the third call. But they were in no mood to hand over the card and why should they, common it’s their card, why would anyone give their credit card to complete stranger just because he has been calling repeatedly. God damn you!!! Customer I will not give you my card.
Since then I’ve made just one more call, on which I even spoke to the assistant manager. A voice filled with all the humility in the world apologized for the delay, as it was caused due a technical hitch but I get the same old assurance. And guess what, ok it’s an easy one, I am still waiting…..

I guess they won’t give it to me unless I break my head, tear my clothes get drunk and shout on the road. At least, Majnu did all these for a girl I am being forced for a credit card. But the desire of that credit card is still burning bright.

“Hum intezaar karenge, Hum intezaar karenge tera qyamat tak, Khuda kare ki qyamat ho aur tu aaye…..”

Ms Indias relive “Mr. India”

Caution: To relate to this wired description, you have to be a “Mr. India” fanatic.

The greatest good you have while clicking fotos is that you get to observe people and web a short story around them almost instantenously. Yesterday we went on a trip to the Dosa parlor. My first 2-3 hr interaction with parul and swati’s all girl group. Hanging out with them brought back memories of the film “Mr. India” as the Ms indias did resemble some or the other characters from that film.

It started from the description of some very funny incidents involving Ridhima which was then followed up by some live examples of her own. It just struck me that her innocence is the same as that of the little girl in the film who says: “Arun bhaya, Arun Bhaya hum jail jayenge”. Yup, most of her dialogues are just out of the blues, freshly plucked. Swati being the grown-up nani of all full with suggestions and fun filled acts of her own fitted into the character of the more matured one who would then respond: “Ridhi ek din nahi khaoogi to maar nahi jaogi”. Although considering the calorie consciousness Ridhi brings in her diet, she would be more than happy in not eating for 2-3 days except 2 plates of "papita", from the fruit shop next to Panchu uncle's, and this too is only for social cause of lighting-up the world with THE GLOW.

And the characters just fell in place. Remember the chamish, having lenses 7 inches thick looks like the person is facing perpetual hyper myopic blindness. He stars at the end of the song “Ball humari hai humko payarii……” and there he appears at the end singing just one word: “ALLAAAAAAAH”. I can still see parul falling here and there with a better exagaration of “AAALLAAAAAHHHH”. We then come to our Sridevi (Snigdha) : “mujhe apna saara paiiiiisaaa wapas chahiye”.She would have almost given a live demonstration of it, if the cook would have not given her a theekha dosa. I am still imagining how Snigdha would sound in that south Indian accent. Here comes the boss Mr. India himself (or herself), Ritika fit like the final piece in the jig-saw as being a local girl from Nagpur most of the advices about local restaurants and eat streets come from her. Imagine her saying to our Sridevi “Wah!! Kya kamra hai madam , kamre kea aage balcony, balcony ke aage garden aur garden kea age samandar, aur yeh sidhiyaan kamre tak jati aur yehi neeche bhi aati hai”.

Sridevi: “kamal hai !!!”.

As for me “Mugamboo khush hua !!”.

Best of analysis

Numerous books float around on the subject of “Self analysis”. But I am still to lay hands on anything which talks sense. Last week we were blessed with few new pickings from the library and most of them were authored by L. Ron Hubbard, a writer I had never heard of. So, I picked up one of his writings called “Self Analysis” but yet again it appears to be just a play of words. More than half of the book consists of some kind of tests filled with long questioners at the end of which I found out absolutely nothing. I don’t think any book has the capability to tell you who you are; it’s for you to find out. And the best way to do it is play sports.

Yes, Sports is one thing which really brings the best critic out in you. Here’s a scenario, I was there at the T.T room waiting for my chance to come. I was looking down when suddenly a voice came directly at me, with a little vigor I must say, “Kyaaaaaaa reeeeee” one of the players shouted. My face lost all its expression as if the brain had lost its wire contact. How you are supposed to react when someone greets you that way right on your face. Anyways, it turned out he was just plain frustrated with himself after missing a shot.

Players do have this great tendency of talking to themselves once on the field whatever their field may be. Have you seen Sreesanth when he marks his run-up back. Looks like he’s explaining to himself what his strength and weaknesses are. Tennis players do it very often too; all those expressions of smile, rejection, toughness etc. are the result of a task well achieved or missed and a result of some kind of self analysis. It’s a very common sight with many of the players whether they make it evident or not is a different matter.

But yes, here is something which brings the best out of you. Talk to yourself and you will know better than reading some nonsense book catered to mass, which are like horoscope predictions, never to go wrong. And if they do which is very often, it’s called the tolerance factor. It does not necessarily mean that you start running on a play filed from now on, talking to yourself. It can be done while playing something as lethargic as a scrabble. Anything which involves mind can be turned into a self analysis task. So set aside those books with long questioners, which would tell you that you are destined to be a doctor while you are actually a pilot. Just expand the wings of your mind and play.

What say, Ek match ho jaye !!!!

Expressions of the Budget Express

And the final budget from Lallu Prasad yadav was delivered yesterday. It had a mere 2% fare cut but was projected by ET as a total election stunt, is it or is it not. If someone browses the surface like a careless fille de chamber (new word learnt, had to use it) it does seems like an election stunt. But dive deeper and you will see there have been fare cuts all five and the railway has been in profit. Am I appreciating Lallu? being from Bihar and having seen what he did to the rich state I hate the guy but he has done a job no one thought about in years or may be in the long history he became the 1st one to let the officials work with all liberty.

Anyways, let’s just look at the current fare cut what it has for the common man. It would have taken me Rs 792 from Nagpur to Rourkela and Rs 386 from there to Ranchi. A 2% fare cut would mean Rs 15.84 in the first journey and Rs 7.72 in the next and final one. It totals up to Rs 23.56 and hence I am suppose to pay Rs 1130.88 at the counter, for obvious reasons I will give a amount of Rs 1150 and would get back Rs 19 leaving 12 paise with railway to start a new train next year (:P). It takes Rs 23-25 for me to reach city from college plus an additional Rs 25 to reach the railway station. And so I have already rolled out around Rs 1180 from my thin pocket. Having paid the amount and getting in hand the generous gift of Rs 19 from railways counter, I definitely calls for a cold drink party. Do consider the heat of Nagpur and a big line at the railway counter and now I have the power of Rs 9, the highest single digit ever invented. But since we visit the city so rarely at least Rs 5 would end up in the pocket of “Raju chat wala” (well that’s hypothetical I never stick to a particular thela or as one of my friend defined it, Thela: that cheap vendor thing). Anyways, pocket is still buzzing with the coins of Rs 4, I am sure of this amount being in coins, 2 rupee note are extinctosorus these days. Hmmmmm …… What not can you do with Rs 4, may be ET can tell me they were projecting it like a huge election stunt. But since I am a rational consumer and who knows the economy is in deep need of these 4 rupees, it would go as part of the tip in which ever restaurant I dine which I would definitely do.

Now, let’s see what did a rational consumer gained from the 2% fare and what ET is thinking was known to Mukesh the playback singer long long back “Ek din bik jayega matti ke mol jag mein reh jayenge payare tere bol……”.

However, differently you spend the gift of the railway counter it’s a surety that a rational consumer will spend it and spend it in something of little worth to any of the ministries, except the fact that in the current scenario they would love to see the money rolling in the market. Hmmm…. now may be you will say what a genius move by the railway ministry. Hence, a 2% fare cut obviously doesn’t sound anywhere close to a election stunt, the UPA government has done some better ones, remember the loan waiver for the farmers. All confirms the hypothesis that the ET reporters missed the big picture of rational consumers this time.

What finally has emerged is credit must be given to the railway ministry for creating a surplus of Rs 90000 crores and still able to cut whatever percentage of fares for the consecutive 5th year. But yes the paper did mention that a lower percentage of fare cut could have been a possibility due to the rise in operating revenue due to the impact of sixth pay commission for the 14 lakh employees working for railways and 11 lakh pensioners. A job well done !!!

Valentine Financial Weekly

Romance floats in the air; although it’s hard feeling to grab for those of us not in love, as for me AIR still feels likeeeee air. Anyways, as many proposals will be made today, few accepted and many rejected. It is this sheer volume of rejections which is the real concern of worry for FOSLA (frustrated one sided lovers association), Government and the economist. We can leave the economist they enjoy to worry.

But the problem still remains very critical. As only few offers get the acceptance tag most people would not reach beyond buying a rose and a card. However, fortunate or unfortunate it may be for them it’s a real unfortunate scenario for government. All the heavy stimulus packages being poured by our Sarkar has only one basic aim increase the money supply, make people spend more but the fraction of hands that join together on this day is posed to disappoint our sardar and governor of RBI.

Now, let’s look at the brighter side of the coin those who actually do pass the exam will be the ones going forward to buy at least a teddy (it’s a necessity to reach the tender heart) and lunch/dinner at fairly expensive restaurant by personal standards. But in the period of recession when the sword of pink slips loom large romance is surely to suffer, as the size of the damn pocket never seems to catch up to the prices of teddies. I mean what is a man suppose to do, save for the rainy day or rain flower petals. The confusion is surely gonna affect the pocket size, a double blow for the sardar and his mates. May be they can present each other flowers to get the ball rolling.

Now, it’s obvious to argue that inflation is down at 4.4% and so spending can increase but guess what, teddies do not appear in any basket of measurement(clarify with CSO), it’s just gonna be your basket. Obvious question: what is government going to do about it? It has already reduced CRR rates, there have been oil price cuts, railway budget will see a 2% cut in AC fare rates, Air fares have gone down for most of the airline except Jet and giving a rose has already been made a Gandhian dream in this country thanks to bollywood.

All these just to make Mr. X and Ms. Y happier and help them buy more teddies and the fact that it is a cotton stuffed toy would make Gandhi followers happier. They finally make a contribution towards the concerns of this country after a long time.

Don’t worry if the all this has increased the anxiety in the already tidal mind of yours, a smile on your valentine’s would wipe it all, so to hell with the government and it policies, just feel the Romance in the air.

Wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day.

Andha Kanoon a Insight

After 25 yrs of abiding the law and being a good or may be law/system scared citizen, I finally got a chance tom read what it is; we have a legal paper in MBA. The most surprising thing I’ve found so far is our constitution being the longest in the world is still only about 300 pages in length. Suddenly a thought blazed why the hell legal books are so thick when the mother of all is of only 300 pages. Also the impression of Andha Kanoon was wiped off which was till now an impression laid down by Bollywood movies. I mean u’ve heard so many times that “kanoon sirf saboot dekhta hai , bhavnaoo ko nahi dekhta” the repetition of this phrase almost unchanged from ages and unanimous in every Hindi film involving court room. And what I learnt was the law has immense room for subjectivity and so it is not blind and does have a mind for sure. It is exactly this subjectivity of which people try to take advantage, some are able to some are not. I think bollywood needs revision but then it needs revision in so many other fields, maybe it’s the bollywood which has gone blind (Andha bollywood).

At present law dosen’t seems that bad a subject if you are just browsing through, exactly what we do here at MBA. And if you happen to go through the some of the judgments it actually tells you that it has done a some excellent job to keep the society going and it’s not the law of the country which is at fault for letting so many slip through as we read in papers but it is also plagued with the most biggest parasites HOMOSAPIEN. I guess if the people had shown some responsibility we would not have had to bare with Sunny Deol shouting “Tareekh par tareekh , tareekh par tareekh, …………. Magar Insaaf nahi mila judge saab”.

I’ll see you on a different tareekh.

Fresh start

Initially I thought of dedicating this blog to post solved crossword clues but since then a lot has changed. Now, that I'm back living college life where HT arrives a day or two late I don't feel like solving it. Also, blocking of 360.yahoo, by the eye-popping IT department of my college, has resulted in a lost touch from the blog world and since luckily this is the only blog site accessible I'm forced to extend its features from a crossword solution blog to a normal one.
Hope to write something good enough to read.